PSYCHOPATH on the BRICK WALL!

meltdown, breakdown, whatever it is... I'm down.

Clearly my grades and my Cumulative Grade Point Average will go down. I'm sure of it. I'm starting to loose hope in the possibility of me shifting to my desired course. I feel like I'm in the value of sad city. I really think that maybe everything is just a dream that maybe I'm not really that meant to go into that path. It scares me when I think that it will never be the path I will end up in. I really feel like dropping out and moving to the school where I was originally suppose to be. I feel like a total shit right now. I feel hopeless, depressed and angry at myself that no matter how much I try and try and try, something is stopping me from getting there.

It never occurred to me the possibility of not reaching my dreams... probably because I was always hoping and dreaming and reaching like the very very high of things... I can literally feel my brain collapse right now. I'm actually going to beg for grades. Literally beg for them. I just need it so I could still be able to qualify for the course I'm shifting. This would be the first time that I'm going to beg for a higher grade. I am  beyond scared.